Melinda Pudding & Dut-Wahs

*Warning: Post likely contains content only I will find humourous*

Naturally, there's going to be a kid-speak post on a Mom blog. I'm surprised I haven't done it sooner. I think about it a lot, especially when I hear something precious come from the mouth of babes. I think, "I should write this down!" And then it's gone. Well, I'm going to start documenting it here. One post only, but I will update.

Melinda pudding. Gaby wasn't able to get her mouth around "vanilla" as a toddler, but she was very capable of saying "melinda", who was my midwife for both Gaby and Colsen. One of her favourite desserts is vanilla pudding, which was affectionately called "Melinda pudding" for at least a year. The other day she asked for "vanilla pudding", which was promptly corrected by Mom and Dad. It will forever be "Melinda pudding".

Dut-wah. Colsen's vocab is slowly progressing. There's a whole lot of talking going on, but not a lot of sense being made. His future as a politician is solid. His interests right now lie with all motorized and non-motorized vehicles, cat tails, kitchen utensils and not saying 'sorry'. Construction vehicles are of particular interest, but his little mouth just can't quite get it. Dump trucks (dut-wahs) are his first love, and just about any and every construction vehicle is identified as a 'dut-wah'. They're doing construction along the route to daycare, so it's a chorus of 'dut-wahs' all the way to and from school each morning. I will cry the day he starts properly saying 'dump truck'.

Roo / Ah-roo / Ah-doo: Colsen is fluent in Whoville speak. This is how he says thank-you.

Baschmoom: Vacuum, of course. :)

Rebib: Robot

Bao: Bottle

Hanta comin: Santa's coming. (He's my boy!)

Soupie: Smoothie

Piscies: Rice Krispies!

Downdairs: Down stairs

Day Two (+7) sans Diet Cola

Selective ignorance has kept me from reading up on aspartame and how the body processes it. I bit the bullet and read up on it a couple days ago. Bleh. Clearly it`s not the diet saviour I had hoped for. Anecdotally, I know it`s a carcinogen, which is never good, but I didn`t realize that the body will still store it as fat (that`s the abbreviated take-away from my reading).

Up until two days ago, I drank at least one can of Coke Zero daily for as long as I can remember. I know that`s not too extreme, but I have decided to attempt a couple weeks without having any at all, just to see how my body reacts.

So far I haven`t really missed it, which is surprising. I`m drinking a lot more water though, which may be helping.

Perhaps the lack of Diet Cola is the saviour I`m looking for.

Will update!!

** Update **

So, I'm now nine days without any cola - diet or regular. I don't miss it at all, surprisingly. I do have a cold, so that may have something to do with it. But, still... I can't remember the last time I didn't have some sort of daily carbonated beverage.

Other than not missing it, though, nothing much has changed.

It's all good, though, I'm going to keep it up. Can't hurt, right? :)

** Final Update - Aug 2nd **

Don't miss it at all. It's a non-issue. :)

The urge to create...

I'm not sure if it's my current obsession with Pinterest, or the utter lack of inspiration I get via my every-day, but I'm starting to feel the need to create something "arty". Strikes me every once in awhile and I'm feeling the itch.

Here are a couple some of the things I think I could do in a reasonable amount of time with a minimal budget and very little destruction to my surroundings. I think I might actually use them, as well.

1. Place a stencil over a coloured shirt.
2. Spray with bleach.

1. Make a collage.
2. Stencil on top.
3. Paint white around the stencil.

We'll see. Thinking about it is easy. Doing it is a whole other department of effort, and I'm not sure if it's open for business yet. :)

Kettlecorn

*whine alert*


Having one of those months where everything is going wrong. Relationships I thought were awesome are actually not. Losing the eye-rolling, seemingly never-ending, weight battle -- badly. Disappointment abound in a number of people who I held in high-regard for quite some time. Feeling like life is moving way too fast and I'm wasting my time working. I miss my kids and wish I could be home with them. When do see them, I'm exhausted and so are they. Trouble keeping up with all housework. And, experiencing a very, very heavy heart about everything going on in the world right now.


Probably pretty typical for a lot of people, but the aggregate is really weighing me down. Very little motivation to do anything. Except eat kettlecorn. Bags of it. Non-stop.


I'm looking forward to reading this post in a month and making fun of myself for it.


*fingers crossed*


Edit: National Post ran a Worthy 30 feature in Saturday's paper, showcasing the top 30 women in Toronto. They ask silly questions meant to give insight into personality... dinner guests, ultimate vacation, guilty pleasure, etc. I was vindicated by the first woman profiled. Her guilty pleasure? Kettlecorn. *high-fives Justine* 

Rabbit vs. Dragon

I'll assume I'm like most people when it comes to horoscopes... I pick and choose as I see fit. If it's positive, I stand by it. If it's not-so-positive, well, it's only "entertainment" and holds no real weight. 


I'm a Rabbit and this is the year of the Dragon. In Chinese culture these two animals, like in nature, do not get along. Long story short, it's going to be a tough year for rabbits... health wise and work wise. It was a big mistake to dismiss this as lore.

Current State

The health portion of my year has been in the sh*tter since Day 1. On December 29th, I woke up (5am) with what I thought was a severe back spasm. This appeared to be only a symptom of a bigger problem... it's was very likely some sort of slipped disc in my neck that was pinching a nerve between my shoulder and neck, and the (scalene?) muscle spasm'd severely in trying to protect it. That's what I can gather so far. We won't know for sure until I'm off the waiting list to get on a waiting list(!) for an MRI. The CT scan and ultrasound were inconclusive, of course.




In the meantime, I'm keeping the Brooklin Natural Health Clinic in business with acupuncture, chiropractor visits and extraordinarily painful massages. 


After five-weeks of icing, cracking, cranking, pins, and pressure points, the strength in my left arm is at about 20% of what it was prior to this incident. The thumb on my left hand is still tingling, and the pain in my arm is constant. It's not excruciating any more, though, so (tingling) thumbs up! Considering the chiropractor told me that my body was in a state of shock when I first arrived on the scene, I guess this is progress. 


I'm about four pills away from a full-blown Percocet addiction -- if my benefits plan wasn't strained before, let's see how it handles a rehab claim. I won't get into the bodily side-effects of the pain killers, but on top of already dealing with the mental effects of constant pain and the winter blahs, the Percocet is acting like a depressant and doing wonders for my metabolism (read with 100% sarcasm). My family doctor thinks the pain will "probably" go away over time, but can't guarantee anything. I took that news well (read with 150% sarcasm).


I won't strain too hard to find an upside, because it hurts too much. But...

• I can turn my head to the right now, so I pose only a mild driving threat.
• I have zero guilt for failing epically my "healthy meals only/gym three days-a-week" New Year's resolution.
• And... I guess... I will never take my health for granted again. When I see Mom's hoisting their kids in the air without shedding a tear, gritting their teeth and wincing in severe pain, I remember the good old days. I hope to see them again.

Future State?

P.S. If any of my brilliant cousins are reading this, after you've finished curing cancer, finding the next global energy source, and touring the world with Shumka, if you could cook up a some sort of pill/shot that can fix this issue ASAP that'd be great. I know it proabably took me 20 years of poor posture, bad sleeping habits and general complacency about my health to get me here, but I'm simply not getting better fast enough for my liking. You'll put the entire physio/chiropractic discipline out of business, but it's not real medicine anyway... right? :) Consider this my application for guinea pig.

The Little Things...

Dedicated to Noah.


One of the things I was truly surprised about when I had a baby was the loss of 'me' time. I know, I know... naive much? But I don't mean hitting the gym three times a week, going out to dinner twice a week, or going to a movie when the mood hit. I mean things like showering, reading a book, eating. Time just gets away from you and priorities are not what they once were.


So, here are a list of little things that, clearly, I used to take for granted and now rejoice in (when I have the time):


Showering
Honestly, it is next to Godliness. When I was a teenager, I would drag my "boombox" (I'm so old) into the bathroom and listen to an entire album during a shower... I'm talking 45 minutes to an hour, minimum. It was nuts, and so gloriously wonderful. Currently, I can't even get through the full Toot & Puddle theme song during my showers. But, when I do grab one (usually left until absolutely necessary) it is a truly wonderful experience. Those 38 seconds, twice a week... heaven.


Grocery shopping
Not sure what's more astounding, how inefficient I am when shopping with the kids, or how efficient I am when I'm shopping solo. I wander when I'm out with the kids, and I feel like I've earned it. Given the three-act-play we go through just to get out of the house and into the car, I'll be damned if I'm going to rush through the store just to get home for Act IV. When you don't get out much, two loops of the local Metro is on par with a night out on the town. When I'm able to scoot out solo, the level of focus is almost scary. 


Sleeping
I have never, ever enjoyed sleep more in my life. Like, ever.


Watching TV
Watching a show, any show, that doesn't including the following phrases... "Oh Toodles, it's time to get to it!", "Who do we ask for help when we don't know which way to go?", "What's gonna work? Teeeeeamwork!", "I'm an animal rescuer!" and "Why is Rintoo crying?" (that tiger has serious emotional issues, btw). Thank God for PVR - I think a TV-addicted Mom with three kids invented that.


Eating
Never one to shy away from food, those Healthy Choice frozen dinners have made my life so much easier. In a pinch, they are so perfect. Not chinsy on the portions and ingredients you can actually recognize. Highly recommended, because anything that requires more than 2-3 steps to cook, ain't gonna happen on a regular basis. (Note, I'm the only one eating these... the kids get the 2-3 step meals.)


I tell ya, though, I could sell tickets to the battle when I'm in need of all five. UFC ain't got nothing on me when there's no food in the house, I'm exhausted, haven't showered in three days and Top Chef is on.

Musings from 2:30am

Payback is a b*tch...

My husband and I were lucky enough to be able to take a week-long vacation, sans kids, to the Dominican a couple weeks go. We farmed the kids out to various family members who generously opened their home and used up their vacation to help us out. Took Gaby a few days to even realize that we were gone, and when she did, she only asked for Daddy (of course). Apparently she kept saying, "Is Daddy still at work?" Too cute.

It seems that Colsen, who's not yet speaking, has decided to make us pay by ending his sleep-through-the-night streak. Yes, he's only nine-months old so there could be other reasons for his sudden wake-ups, but he's been giving us 11-hour stretches for a couple months now, so I believe this is purely malicious.

At 2:30am this morning (after the 1:30am and 2am wake up) I had just about had it. Nearly gave my husband a heart attack when I threw the blankets back and stormed out of bed. Blazed a trail into Colsen's room, up to the crib, I tersely told him to "stop kicking out of his swaddle" (because I'm sure all he needed was a stern talking to *rolls eyes*), put the soother back in his mouth and stormed out.

Back into bed, adrenalin pumping and seriously questioning why I want a third kid, I try to relax. Fifteen minutes later, I was just about to drift off... and my husband starts snoring. Not loud, just a kind of soft, deep breathing. Honest to GOD, I nearly lost my mind. I actually thought, "Dear, you would be safer if you suffered heart failure right now than if you continued to snore..." He must've felt my tension, because the snoring stopped immediately.

I'm currently looking to book another vacation, this time with the whole family, in hopes of righting our wrong. Clearly, Colsen doesn't come cheap.